Dens' Prom Asking Disaster/girl Problems

[Rx330driver]

i imagine it to be worse in cali. but yeah, the higher interest rates and the high cost of the houses here are rediculous. its crazy but i dont think its a balloon. The housing costs in SF at least will never drop unless theres a giant earthquake. Thats the perfect time to buy a house.

[denslexusgx470]

i imagine it to be worse in cali. but yeah, the higher interest rates and the high cost of the houses here are rediculous. its crazy but i dont think its a balloon. The housing costs in SF at least will never drop unless theres a giant earthquake. Thats the perfect time to buy a house.

There are certain places that will have it's ups and downs. SF has one too, just not as big of a DOWN as other places, like Fresno. :cries:

[denslexusgx470]

Ok today i really confirmed to myself, that I should just keep me and the girl, like it is. No asking her, no telling her, and NO MAKING THE MOVE.

I took her out for a starbucks today, and while we were at starbucks, she calls up "mr. handsome" and says something, but I don't remember what she said because i was on the phone also when she called him. After I was done with my phone call, I really wanted to mess around with her, and I said (in a loud enough voice so the guy on the other end could hear it) "Ohhh, *** (i don't want to say his name, saying it just makes me angry! :chairshot: )is soooo hoot and cute." haha. She smirked, and continued on with her conversation. :(

Her birthday's tomorrow. Yikes. Looks like she may be getting a surprise. I found out that she's just going home after school so I'm gonna drive my !Removed! to Baskin & Robins right after school, and drop her little cake off at her house. She has no idea it's coming to her. You guys think I should do my "prom plan" but instead have the cake in the back of the 4Runner?!?!? haha. j/k. That's a little too much.

But I think me giving her a cake might add more kudos to her mom and sister. Her sister thought I was cute because I made her two music mix CDs, and her mom does "approve" me as her friend, and she doesn't approve the guy she currently likes :lol:

[Rx330driver]

do you keep calling him mr. handsome...or did she make that up

[denslexusgx470]

haha. I call him "mr handsome" because i'm just trying to make fun of him. lol. Fine the guy's name is Tim(idk his last name) but when me and my friend talk about this whole situation i call the guy "mr handsome" when we're making fun of him and Tim when Im mad about something! lol

[Rx330driver]

seems more like a compliment to me

[denslexusgx470]

Thats why I always try to remember to put quotes so it wouldnt look like a compliment. Trust me the guy does not look any way handsome! I would even say her ex looks 10x more handsome than this Tim guy! lol

[SW03ES]

Whoops, you landed square in the friend zone. Good luck getting out of there. When you pick on her about the other guy it sends her a message that you're not interested in her that way, thats something girls do to each other.

First question, why were you on the phone when you were sitting at Starbucks with her? It always amuses me to see two people sitting somewhere, both of them on the phone with different people, and completely ignoring each other.

When you're with her, you've got to be with her.

i imagine it to be worse in cali. but yeah, the higher interest rates and the high cost of the houses here are rediculous.

Interest rates are still very low. What is it now on a 30 year fixed 6.25%? Thats nothing.

[denslexusgx470]

Wasn't my fault! Someone called me and it was kinda important so i had to answer it! Plus like i said in the previous post, I'm not doing anything more than being friends with her. I've disciplined myself that this is all I can do. Unless there comes a big problem between her and Tim (or aka "Mr. handsome") then that's when i'll make the move. :cries:

[denslexusgx470]

omg long story short that was the most difficult gift giving Ive ever done! At first i thought she wasnt going to be home then she said she was until i was about to buy it dat i learned that she was at Compusa! geez but i guess she liked it At school someone had the office send her a starbucks drink and everyone in the class thought it was from me! She totally thought it was from me cuz its the same flavor i get every time at starbucks!

[SW03ES]

Screw that guy, ask her now.

[denslexusgx470]

Screw that guy, ask her now.

That will be quite difficult. This guy's a former drug addict, and gang member. I mean yes I may be in martial arts, but I don't use it to prove anything, or to start fights. My moto's always been "I don't START fights, but I will END them(in a winning way of course lol)".

So idk, I'm really lost with things. If i ask her, it might backfire against me, and might ruin things completely! :chairshot: :chairshot:

[SW03ES]

Risk is all part of the game. (I'm talking about potentially ruining things with her, not the other guy).

Does she know these things about this guy?

[Rx330driver]

quick 21st century run down on teenagers

drug addicts=cool

cool nice guys=uncool

:)

[denslexusgx470]

Sw, what do you mean "things" about the other guy???

Anyways so i get more and more questions from nosey girls at school asking me "Denny do you like her" and stuff. I'm really getting "caught" off guard a lot now because people are probably feeling that I like her! One of my friends, while we were walking down the hall, comments me (because me and the girl were walking together, not holding hands, but i decided to walk with her since i saw her in the hall) "Hey so you two been flirting lately huh" and she answers (well in a jokingly way i guess) "Haha, you're just jealous!" and at that point, i was like, wtf? I didn't really quite expect that answer, and when she said that, to demonstrate the "flirting" she kinda laid her head against me. Soooo..... idk. Things are getting more complicated. I know i should ask, but I'm totally scared of the rejection. Let's just say I have no "BALLS" to ask. So right now i'm really feeling my way in thru her best friend, which is like her "sidekick" friend, while my best friend (with the S40 in one of my GX pix) is kinda like my "sidekick" in my side, and he thinks that talking to her "sidekick" is the only way to go through this matter.

If I should do it myself, how should i ask? Where should i ask? When should I ask? WHY SHOULD I ASK?!?!?!?!?!?!? :unsure:

[SW03ES]

I know you're afraid of the rejection, but you've GOT to get past that. Not just for now, but for your future. All this going through other people doesn't work, you've just got to take the risk and breach the subject with her yourself.

Just say something like "I know you're going to the prom with whoever, but I've really grown to like you during the time we've spent together, can we go get some dinner sometime?" or something like that. Its all that it takes. Just keep telling yourself, if you don't give it a shot you loose by default. If you're gonna loose, you might as well get out on the field first.

Now, you've got to be prepared for her to say no, or that she doesn't feel that way about you though. Girls that age are weird and fickle. Play it cool. don't overdo it. If she says something you don't like, keep your composure and tell her its okay. Remember, if she rejects you its about her, not you. If you be yourself thats all you can do, if she's not receptive to that its her loss.

I KNOW its hard believe me, when I was your age I was painfully bad at stuff like this. It doesn't get any easier either, but you know what that means? It means you're one of the good guys. When it comes to women in the long run, good guys don't finish last ;)

[Rx330driver]

When it comes to women in the long run, good guys don't finish last

what they dont tell you in the books is that its a very very long run.

totally, if she rejects you, act like it doesnt affect you at all. Play it cool, just go like "hey no big deal, that you'll get over it etc etc"

rejection is hard. Im like steve, took me a while to get the hang of it. I steered clear of interviews and making the first move. Luckily, in college, its easier to meet more people and then you kinda get the sparks at the same time.

I came from an all boys middle school, junior high, high school! i didnt really have that kinda friendship with a majority of girls. Take it from someone whose been through hard times, it gets easier.

[denslexusgx470]

That's it. I've decided NO. Why? Cuz today, i called her after I saw her leaving school late (which surprised me, cuz i thought she was gonna right after school but i guess not) and I asked her "Sooo you were chilling with Tim I guess?!?!" and I was correct. Forget it, I've got no balls, she likes him more, and I'm one of those losers that will never win in situations like these. Unless all you guys fly to Fresno and threaten to scratch my GX, then maybe I'll do it, otherwise I give up! :cries: :cries:

But i still asked her friend to discuss it with her, and she did, but she hasn't told me EXACTLY what was discussed so as I'm typing I'm awaiting a myspace message from her friend. <_< <_<

[denslexusgx470]

OUCH :cries: :cries: :cries: :cries: Now i'm defnitely not going to tell her. I was hurt when I read her friend's message to me, as to what she said, even though my prediction was right....

"hey denny. well ya. like u figuresd out she said she doesnt see u like that ur just a frend to her and she really likes tim. she also said it would b really wierd if u liked her. sorry. well ttyl. luv ya. bye.

ME

P.S. dont worry she wont figure it out. "

Then I asked her what she meant by weird, and this is how it goes. This girl (ok her name's Alex, short for Alejandra) Alex looks and treats me like a "brother" and supposidly i should look at her as my "sister". So obviously anyone in the right mind wouldn't "like" a "brother, sister, or cousin" right?? So that's what she meant by weird. I know she really likes Tim, but that last sentence is really what killed me!

uhh man! I even told Alex through myspace that WE (her and me) need to have a starbucks one of these days, I'll buy her whatever drink, and that I need to tell her something, but now I really really don't feel like telling her anymore, or even buying her that starbucks! :chairshot: :chairshot: :chairshot:

[indiasfinest]

dude, i've been in your shoes man, were only a year or two apart. it takes some time, but you will get over her, trust me, its hard, but you just got to see other girls, girls in high school are so flirty that if we were 3 years younger, you would think that they have a crush on you. I know what you mean by her leaning her head on you and stuff, it will be hard but try to move on

[SW03ES]

My fiance and I were (and still are) best friends for years before we got together. In fact, we're both only children and we used to consider each other the brother and sister we never had. I even called her "Sis" as a nickname.

SO, don't discount anything. Life's funny. When you find that you have feelings for someone you REALLY know and that you're really comfortable with its so much better than trying to get to know someone with all that relationship tension around.

Just stick it out, look for other possibilities and wait and see. If you really like this girl you're probably better off anyways. Girls that age are fickle, what they want one minute they want to get away from the next. When you get into college you'll start to meet people who are more mature, and you'll be happier. Trust me.

[denslexusgx470]

Let's just say, I've been in this crappy private high school my whole 4 years, and since all 4 grades equal about 620 students in the WHOLE school (every year), I've never really had any crush on any girl, cuz choices are so limited! Anyways, college's just around the corner, gotta strike gold there. Me and my best friend are like identically the same in experiences, so he too hasn't been thru this.

The only crush i had before, was my freshman year, this senior girl, BOMB. :blushing:

Saw her, had a big !Removed! crush on her, starting not on the first day of school, but freshman orientation day! haha. <_<

Now I'm gonna have a whole new experience, to be friends in the "brotherly and sisterly" way with Alex... :P

But i'm over it. No worries. What i did was I texted her this morning regarding the permit test she just took. Yes she's 18 and is barely getting her permit! haha. AT first she borrowed my permit test, and lost it, but eventually found it and she passed it by the maximum number wrong, I presume. lol. So i got a good laugh out of that so it's all fine now. ;)

[nc211]

My fiance and I were (and still are) best friends for years before we got together. In fact, we're both only children and we used to consider each other the brother and sister we never had. I even called her "Sis" as a nickname.

SO, don't discount anything. Life's funny. When you find that you have feelings for someone you REALLY know and that you're really comfortable with its so much better than trying to get to know someone with all that relationship tension around.

Just stick it out, look for other possibilities and wait and see. If you really like this girl you're probably better off anyways. Girls that age are fickle, what they want one minute they want to get away from the next. When you get into college you'll start to meet people who are more mature, and you'll be happier. Trust me.

Although I'm a little freaked out where SWO's "sis" relationship has gone to, a little too southern for me, if ya' catch my drift! Hahaha.. BUT, I agree with him 110%! Dens, you just wait for college my man, you'll see... It's a WHOLE new ball game, with all new rules and players. The best thing about college v. high school, is that in college, you get to meet people who come from all over the world to learn the same things you want to learn. You meet people who are like you, because they want to be like you, they share your interests and your goals. THAT makes all the difference in the world man! Instead of being stuck with the same people in the same zip code for 4 years straight, going through the same classes and same life-steps as you. In college, it all changes. AND, the theory of drug addicts=cool and cool nice guys = uncool, becomes "sooooo highschool" like, totally, oh my gawd. Those drug addicts now become wasteoids who are stuck in the same rutt, going no where. As where Mr. College guy gets to move on. You'll win amigo, no worries, you'll win. Just give it a few more months, heck, even a few more weeks, and you'll see! Once you graduate from High School, you'll start preparing for college, and you'll see how things change. It's a GREAT time in a young man's life, if you've played your cards right, which judging from your posts over the years, you clearly have! You're about to get your reward Dens, and I have a feeling you're gonna love it! And that girl who's strapped a drug addict to her side is about to become quite jealous of you!

Time tells all tales, but this one is easy. Stay on course, and you'll soon find yourself miles ahead of what you though was "out of your league". It not only happens all the time, it happens EVERY time!!

[nc211]

But if you want to know where you made the shift form potential boyfriend materiel to brother status.... it happened when her mom approved of you, which is why she likes Mr. McMoran-Snorthound-DubbieDumbAss. Mommy don't like him, so she does. Happened to me a few times too man. Being southern by nature, Yes Sir / Yes Maam is my way, and I expect kids to address me as such, as I have. But when we moved to KC in the late 80's from Birmingham Alabama, my Sir's and Maam's put me as "the prize" in momma's eyes. Which totally wrecked me.

However, in college, girls stop rebelling against their mom and dad, and they actually look for someone they could bring home to meet the folks. Well, the kind of girls you want to be with anyway. Watch out for the others, what used to be a butt kicking by bad-boy boyfriend behind the KenTacoHut "Kentucky Fried Chicken / Taco Bell / Pizza Hut, all under 1 roof", now becomes a trip to the clinic for "it burns when i pee". YOU DON'T WANT THAT! When in doubt, screw the rubber, just go home and get online!

[SW03ES]

LOL, hey I am from West Virginia!