If I Was Elected President...

[ArmyofOne]

"My Fellow Americans: As you all know, the defeat of the Iraq regime has been completed. Since Congress does not want to spend any more money on this war, and you all (and our troops) are ready to end it, our mission in Iraq is complete. This morning I gave the order for a complete removal of all American forces from Iraq . This action will be complete within 30 days. It is now time to begin the reckoning.

Before me, I have two lists. One list contains the names of countries which have stood by our side during the Iraq conflict. This list is short. The United Kingdom , Spain , Bulgaria , Australia , and Poland are some of the countries listed there. The other list contains every one not on the first list. Most of the world's nations are on that list. My press secretary will be distributing copies of both lists later this evening. Let me start by saying that effective immediately, foreign aid to those nations on List 2 ceases indefinitely. The money saved during the first year alone will pretty much pay for the costs of the Iraqi war. THEN EVERY YEAR THEREAFTER It'll GO TO OUR SOCIAL SECURITY SYSTEM SO IT WONT GO BROKE IN 20 YEARS. The American people are no longer going to pour money into third world Hell holes and watch those government leaders grow fat on corruption.

Need help with a famine? Wrestling with an epidemic? Call France ...

In the future, together with Congress, I will work to redirect this money toward solving the vexing social problems we still have at home. On that note, a word to terrorist organizations. Screw with us and we will hunt you down and eliminate you and all your friends from the face of the earth. Thirsting for a gutsy country to terrorize? Try China... Bet ya'll will only do it once.

I am ordering the immediate severing of diplomatic relations with France , and Russia . Thanks for all your help, comrades. We are retiring from NATO as well. As such I have instructed the Mayor of New York City to begin towing the many UN diplomatic vehicles located in Manhattan with more than two unpaid parking tickets to sites where those vehicles will be stripped, shredded and crushed. I don't care about whatever treaty pertains to this You creeps have tens of thousands of unpaid tickets. Pay those tickets tomorrow or watch your precious Benzes, Beamers and limos be turned over to some of the finest chop shops in the world. I love New York.

A special note to our neighbors: Canada is on List 1. Mexico is on List 2. Its president and his entire corrupt government really need an attitude adjustment. I will have a couple thousand extra tanks and infantry divisions sitting around. Guess where I am going to put 'em? Yep, border security.

Oh, by the way, the United States is abrogating the NAFTA treaty - starting now. We are tired of the one-way highway. Immediately, we'll be drilling for oil in Alaska -which will take care of this country's oil needs for decades to come. If you're an environmentalist who opposes this decision, I refer you to List 2 above: pick a country and move there. It is time for America to focus on its own welfare and its own citizens. Some will accuse us of isolationism. I answer them by saying, 'F***in' A...'

Nearly a century of trying to help folks live a decent life around the world has only earned us the undying enmity of just about everyone on the planet. It is time to eliminate hunger in America. It is time to eliminate homelessness

in America. To the nations on List 1, a final thought. Thank you guys. We owe you and we won't forget.

To the nations on List 2, a final thought: You might want to learn to speak Arabic.

God bless America ....

Thank you and good night."

"Oh and if you can read this in English,

thank a soldier."

[lenore]

Boy do I agree with that....God Bless.

[LEXIRX330]

Here we go. :whistles:

But what the heck. I agree with it too! :)

[pj8708]

Here we go. :whistles:

But what the heck. I agree with it too! :)

Not only here we go, but no I won't! LOL!

[ArmyofOne]

Boy do I agree with that....God Bless.

LOL knew you would ;)

Here we go. :whistles:

But what the heck. I agree with it too! :)

What?

Not only here we go, but no I won't! LOL!

umm wait...so do you agree or not? LOL! Either way is fine.

[pj8708]

Boy do I agree with that....God Bless.

LOL knew you would ;)

Here we go. :whistles:

But what the heck. I agree with it too! :)

What?

Not only here we go, but no I won't! LOL!

umm wait...so do you agree or not? LOL! Either way is fine.

Both......

[lenore]

OK Paul, man up get it out, either way we respect your opinion....

[pj8708]

OK Paul, man up get it out, either way we respect your opinion....

Your going to be dissapointed...., I'm too darn tired to care at the moment, so I said "both". I agree with some,(fixing our vexing social problems for example) and disagree with others, (resigning from NATO as an example). If this continues on for a while and I get some sleep, I may get swept up in another one of our discussions "du'jour"...LOL!!

[lenore]

good man, rest up...