I found that I could buy the Lexus tow hitch wiring harness as a separate item (without the tow bar) from my local Lexus Parts Department.
The wiring harness part number was: 08942-48870-BB. My cost was $55.73 + tax (10/04/08).
I followed some of the installation instructions as I found here in a .pdf for the RX300/RX400h:
http://www.sewellpartsonline.com/import/PDF/RX330_TOW.PDF
One thing different from using the full Lexus tow bar was attaching the outer electrical receptacle to my tow bar. I did NOT drill holes in the tow bar to screw the receptacle on, as this could weaken the tow bar. I strapped the receptacle on using two 2-3/4" hose clamps which I spray-painted black.