I took a used keyfob to my dealer to program. He said he tried, failed, and charged me $50. Turns out the case had the right numbers on the outside, but the circuit board inside was different from my 2011 ES350. So I bought another used fob with the right circuit board inside and took it back to the dealer. Failed again but paid my $50 again.
It seems this dealer doesn't know how to reset the system and only knows how to program new keys.
I took it to the Toyota dealer who said "no problem." But the tech who would have done the work said he needed a code from Lexus, and since he was a Toyota dealer, he couldn't do it. Sorry. But at least he didn't charge me.