I have Cingular and just bought the Motorala V3 Razr and it was very easy to connect to the RX330 (I have the 2005 model). The only drawback is that you can only transfer one number from your phonebook to the RX330 at a time. Since I have just a few phone numbers, it's not a biggie for me, but if you're dealing with hundreds of numbers, that could be problematic.
When in the car, the BT connects as soon as the car is turned on and the call instantly transfers. Additionally, I see the bars showing how strong a reception I get. Calls also ring in the car. Just haven't figured out call waiting yet!
Motorola has some software called Mobile Phone Tools that apparently allows synchronization between the phone and Outlook, which would get you the features you mentioned above. I personally have not used this software yet, so I can't speak from experience.
If you go to lexus.letstalk.com, you can see all the phones that Lexus says will connect to the RX330. From there, go to the Bluetooth users guides. In the "transfer numbers to the car" section, they should mention if the phone/car connection supports multiple number being transferred at once, or if it's a one-number-at-a-time thing.
Hope this helps,
Phyl