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An Oldie, But Still Put A Smile On My Face When I Read It - Humor


Lesux

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This is for light humor. Please don't take it seriously.

Hyundai: Hope You Understand Nothing is Drivable And Inexpensive

Audi: Another Ugly Dutch Invention

Saab: Shape Appears As Backwards

Ford: Fast Only Rolling Downhill

First On Rubbish Dump

Found On Road Dead

Fix Or Repair Daily

Fix Often Rust Daily

Fill Oil Reservoir Daily

*BLEEP*ed Over Rebuilt Dodge

Fiat: Fix It Again Tony

Volvo: Very Odd Looking Vehicular Object

BMW: Black Man's Wish

Break My Window

Break My Wallet

Bought My Wife

Be My Weasel

M-B: Molested Boys

Pontiac: Poor Old Negro Thinks It's A Cadillac

Porsche: Poor Old Rich !Removed! Can't Have Erection

Persnickety Old Roaster, Sucks Cash, Hellaciously Expensive

Nissan: Nasty Impenetrable Smoke Signals All Night

Lotus: Lots Of Trouble Usually Serious

Add you own if you know more.

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This is for light humor. Please don't take it seriously.

Hyundai: Hope You Understand Nothing is Drivable And Inexpensive

Audi: Another Ugly Dutch Invention

Saab: Shape Appears As Backwards

Ford: Fast Only Rolling Downhill

First On Rubbish Dump

Found On Road Dead

Fix Or Repair Daily

Fix Often Rust Daily

Fill Oil Reservoir Daily

*BLEEP*ed Over Rebuilt Dodge

Fiat: Fix It Again Tony

Volvo: Very Odd Looking Vehicular Object

BMW: Black Man's Wish

Break My Window

Break My Wallet

Bought My Wife

Be My Weasel

M-B: Molested Boys

Pontiac: Poor Old Negro Thinks It's A Cadillac

Porsche: Poor Old Rich !Removed! Can't Have Erection

Persnickety Old Roaster, Sucks Cash, Hellaciously Expensive

Nissan: Nasty Impenetrable Smoke Signals All Night

Lotus: Lots Of Trouble Usually Serious

Add you own if you know more.

Certainly true of a lot of those makers and models ! lol

However, the writing as a whole contains obvious negative racial overtones, regardless of what race/nationalty and are not appropiate for the guidlines of the LOC.

Thanks for your considerateration.

Paul

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I fully agree with you. I wasn't 'pleased' with some of them, but I didn't write any of them. I was looking thru an old folder as I am selling one of my cars and saw that list for the first time in probably 5-10 years. I didn't even remember I had such a list.

The thing is humor is basically done while attacking s*x, race, politics or religion. Humor can be quite vulgar and offensive and often will not be understood in many foreign countries. So humor is always a controversial topic and what might be perceived as funny to some, might be interpreted as offensive to others. Religion is a classic example.

It is for this reason I added 'please do not take it seriously'.

Moreover, since that list was written, some of the brands mentionned have improved dramatically, while others have gone down.

Just too bad it is so hard to come with a good acronym for Lexus, a brand I now love a great deal. The X is complicating everything.

Thanks for your understanding.

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Oh man get over it, Cant we enjoy the old cliches....

we have become a bunch of women in our male society.....(no offense to the better half)

So am I to assume you agree with molesting children? Is that one of your old "Cllches"?

You believe that this is a male society. So if a female is born should it be put to death as is sometimes the custom in old China?

Since this is a male society, then as with certain current Muslim believers, your wife is your property.

The old cliches joked about how many enemy the Tuskegee Airmen shot down during WWII. Whops.....wait a minute, that wasn't a joke or a cliche, It was a band of African American fighter pilots whose Gold Medal from Congress is on display in the Smithsonian.

Your so called cliches are not only ignorant, they lay bare you inability to think of any one but your self.

For less than 2 cents I'd ask to have you banned.

Paul

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Paul, This is not a male society, it is made of both Man and Woman, However the Men are becoming feminized or chasticed for saying or doing things that were shared amongst men. Lighten up, all of your statements above are rediculous and are not what I implied. Funny I can go to a movie and Djangle Unchained, watch the N word declared about 100 times and Hollywood created this, and nobody says anything about the storey in this movie (by the way, way too gruesome for me) These are historical events, but you want them banned from our language.A rap artist and can say garbage all day long and it is considered art, but goodness, anybody else is not allowed.The cliches are all things that poked fun at different autos, I read them and found them so true, and Hey how many times have I said Found on the road dead and that I would never have one, but am a proud owner of a Ford F 150. Life is full of amusement, enjoy it and quit worrying about the fly crap in the pepper barrel...The cliches are just that, a part of our historical amusements. Just like pimp mobiles are recognized by everybody for what they are...Hey it created a show on tv (PIMP my Ride). We all make fun of ourselves and in the right context makes us laugh..We can not rewrite history, but look back and learn from it and never ban it from our society....Otherwise we are doomed to repeat. By the way I found my referenced movie above one that I would not recommend viewing, way to slanted and very grotesque.....Laugh Paul, take all of the cliches and recognize that they are part of our past, and as human nature we will always poke fun at cars that our friends have, unless we own one too....My friends always remind me on my Found on road dead statement when I drive my Ford, At least I am not driving a government motors vehicle....(my friend does and he is actually thinking of breaking free from GM and going to Ford))

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Well he is moving toward that thinking, he was actually talking a RAV4, and this is from a hard line GM guy for 23 years that is All he has driven....RAV4 for wife and Ford truck for him....I will believe it when I see it, other wise He drives Government Motors....The big bail out company...But I see a Chevrolet in his future....We know our friends well, all talk and fun, but when the tire hits the road, it is somewhere else...

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Paul, This is not a male society, it is made of both Man and Woman, However the Men are becoming feminized or chasticed for saying or doing things that were shared amongst men.

LOL, I'm going to ignore the chauvinism and sexism of this statement and chock it up to us being from different generations.

Lighten up, all of your statements above are rediculous and are not what I implied. Funny I can go to a movie and Djangle Unchained, watch the N word declared about 100 times and Hollywood created this, and nobody says anything about the storey in this movie (by the way, way too gruesome for me) These are historical events, but you want them banned from our language.A rap artist and can say garbage all day long and it is considered art, but goodness, anybody else is not allowed.

Its Django Unchained. The difference between a movie, and a rap song, and a post on the LOC is that the first two were sought out by someone looking for that sort of entertainment. Two mediums that just cannot be more dissimilar.

The LOC is just not a place for anything that could be construed as being racist, or sexist, or whatever.

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Paul, This is not a male society, it is made of both Man and Woman, However the Men are becoming feminized or chasticed for saying or doing things that were shared amongst men.

LOL, I'm going to ignore the chauvinism and sexism of this statement and chock it up to us being from different generations.

>Lighten up, all of your statements above are rediculous and are not what I implied. Funny I can go to a movie and Djangle Unchained, watch the N word declared about 100 times and Hollywood created this, and nobody says anything about the storey in this movie (by the way, way too gruesome for me) These are historical events, but you want them banned from our language.A rap artist and can say garbage all day long and it is considered art, but goodness, anybody else is not allowed.

Its Django Unchained. The difference between a movie, and a rap song, and a post on the LOC is that the first two were sought out by someone looking for that sort of entertainment. Two mediums that just cannot be more dissimilar.

The LOC is just not a place for anything that could be construed as being racist, or sexist, or whatever.

I am no diffrent than anyone else. What one person may calll art, I may see as just a waist of perfectly good paint. But in 2013, still thinking a joke about a "Negro wanting a BMW" versus any other race, in my opinion can't be construde as anything other than racist.

But the one that I will defend the most Lenore is your apparent total acceptance of "M-B = Molesting boys" .......We have argued many times about politics and other things that make being conservatives and liberals fun to bat the ball back and forth. But with sickening knowledge we have been jolted by, "Molesting Children" is not an "Old boys Cliche", it is sick and perpetuates one of the most depraved acts in our society.

This list HAS some real oldies but goodies. Since it was announced that Consumer Reports named Lexus as the BEST CAR of all cars we definately need a Lexus cliche that matches our No. 1 cars.

Paul

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I fully agree with you. I wasn't 'pleased' with some of them, but I didn't write any of them. I was looking thru an old folder as I am selling one of my cars and saw that list for the first time in probably 5-10 years. I didn't even remember I had such a list.

The thing is humor is basically done while attacking s*x, race, politics or religion. Humor can be quite vulgar and offensive and often will not be understood in many foreign countries. So humor is always a controversial topic and what might be perceived as funny to some, might be interpreted as offensive to others. Religion is a classic example.

It is for this reason I added 'please do not take it seriously'.

Moreover, since that list was written, some of the brands mentionned have improved dramatically, while others have gone down.

Just too bad it is so hard to come with a good acronym for Lexus, a brand I now love a great deal. The X is complicating everything.

Thanks for your understanding.

Thanks for the humor!! Bet you didn't think it could become this controversial.

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Quite frankly I unlike you, I looked at the list and didnt dwell on any particuler cliche, as for M-B well I am totally against that behavior, but quite frankly when first read, didnt have any idea of its meaning. I chose to enjoy the Fix it again tony etc. Oh my is that a racial slur against my Italian wife....? Your observation that I accepted something because it was in a list of cliches is rediculous...I just was trying to get across that this was a long list of cliches that I found many were funny. I concur if the forum is against any racial tones both enlightening or self inflected that we will not tolerate them. I just thought this was a open forum for sharing amusement as well as knowledge. Since I am both German, Irish, and have Italian in my family I feel this thread should be removed....

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A couple of minutes of editing would have made the list better (to say the least). But I'm glad it didn't deteriorate into the usual political rhetoric, given this is an automotive forum with emphasis on Lexus.

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Let me know when you get to Volkswagen... Until then, I'll be busy replacing the ole ball n' chain's !Removed! cruiser with a Tora-Tora Highlander...

If this offends anyone - I refer you to my avatar for a reason..

Mit freundlichen Grüßen, der Dorftrottel

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I fully agree with you. I wasn't 'pleased' with some of them, but I didn't write any of them. I was looking thru an old folder as I am selling one of my cars and saw that list for the first time in probably 5-10 years. I didn't even remember I had such a list.

The thing is humor is basically done while attacking s*x, race, politics or religion. Humor can be quite vulgar and offensive and often will not be understood in many foreign countries. So humor is always a controversial topic and what might be perceived as funny to some, might be interpreted as offensive to others. Religion is a classic example.

It is for this reason I added 'please do not take it seriously'.

Moreover, since that list was written, some of the brands mentionned have improved dramatically, while others have gone down.

Just too bad it is so hard to come with a good acronym for Lexus, a brand I now love a great deal. The X is complicating everything.

Thanks for your understanding.

Thanks for the humor!! Bet you didn't think it could become this controversial.

Honestly, I didn't agree with the whole list and did find some pretty stupid and offensive.

I guess I should spend some time and try to come up with a list of my own. Lexus is an almost impossible one to get right because of the X. I now love the brand. My first Lexus , a 2009 RX 350 didn't live up to my expectations. Seats not comfortable enough and ride is a bit noisy. But the 2009 ES 350 I bought last month is pure heaven. The seats are so much better than the RX and the ride is SO quiet. I am now the slowest driver on the road. And I used to be among the most aggresive drivers just a few weeks ago (no joke). Sorry for being off topic.

Charlie Chaplin once said that a day without a laugh is a day lost.

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Hey boy's and girls.....how about a new list of the things the big L really screwed up (in my opinion) on the new 2013 ES350. It rides like a lumber wagon!!

If no one else agrees, I'll keep my mouth shut. But honestly everyday I drive it, I wonder if I made a mistake , and and should gotten another 2010 or 2012.

Paul

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