Atm

[JENunnez]

Let me start off with a disclaimer. This is by no means to offend any of the ladies out there and none intended.

MALE VS. FEMALE AT THE ATM MACHINE

A new sign in the Bank Lobby reads:

'Please note that this Bank is installing new Drive-through ATM machines enabling customers to withdraw cash without leaving their vehicles.

After months of careful research, MALE & FEMALE Procedures have been developed. Please follow the Appropriate steps for your gender.'

*******************************

MALE PROCEDURE:

1. Drive up to the cash machine.

2. Put down your car window.

3. Insert card into machine and enter PIN.

4. Enter amount of cash required and w ithdraw.

5. Retrieve card, cash and receipt.

6. Put window up.

7. Drive off.

*******************************

FEMALE PROCEDURE:

1. Drive up to cash machine.

2. Reverse and back up the required amount to align car window with the machine.

3. Set parking brake, put the window down.

4. Find handbag, remove all contents on to passenger seat to locate card.

5. Tell person on cell phone you will call them back and hang up.

6. Attempt to insert card into machine.

7. Open car door to allow easier access to machine due to its excessive distance from the car.

8. Insert card.

9. Re-insert card the right way.

10. Dig through handbag to find diary with your PIN written on the inside back page.

11. Enter PIN.

12. Press cancel and re-enter correct PIN.

13. Enter amount of cash required.

14. Check makeup in rear view mirror.

15. Retrieve cash and receipt.

16. Empty handbag again to locate wallet and place cash inside.

17. Write debit amount in check register and place receipt in back of checkbook.

18. Re-check makeup.

19. Drive forward 2 feet.

20. Reverse back to cash machine.

21. Retrieve card.

22. Re-empty hand bag, locate card holder, and place card into the slot provided!

23. Give dirty look to irate male driver waiting behind you.

24. Restart stalled engine and pull off.

25. Redial person on cell phone.

26. Drive for 2 to 3 miles.

27. Release Parking Brake.

[dcfish]

[raymsixsix]

Man you just opend Pandora's Box with that one... Good luck! LOL

[denslexusgx470]

According to step #24, the female is the one driving a stick shift? Makes the guys look like amateurs lol.

[jcrome04]

hahahahahahah very funny

[SW03ES]

LOL, its so true too!

[Alexander the o.k.]

Hilarious JE, and right on the mark, at least around where I live.

(Good luck with the wife or girlfriend tho. Or better yet, just don't let her see this thread... ;) )

[Blayd]

:D :D :D

[JENunnez]

Belive me they saw it and totally agree that it's the truth.

They do exactly what is listed.

They laughed and couldn't argue the facts.

[Alexander the o.k.]

Well my friend, you've either got stones made out of Titanium, and like Superman, don't mind being kicked there once in a while, or you live with some very honest, and honorable women!

I need to move closer to where you are, as there is a bit of a shortage of them here lately.

Or I may have to move to Krypton...

[eatingupblacktop]

[LexKid630]

Haha, too funny :P

[Lexusfreak]

Lol....I enjoyed that!

[Lexus2D]

:( :whistles:

[smooth1]

funny stuff man!!!

[SW03ES]

:( :whistles:

C'mon, you have to admit it has a small iota of reality ;)